I’ll fast forward the unnecessary parts about me. We’re all like big books walking about every day, adding words and chapters to our stories. But a good writer knows what to cut, what to subdue, and what to exaggerate in order to create a perspective that is unexpected. I think that’s something worth reading. I’m not here to make any claims about my writing, but I do prefer the quiet moments I spend clacking away at my keyboard, surrounded by my dogs – usually with them sleeping through the afternoon. It just helps me remember things, both the good and the bad, which I find equally interesting.

This is me from my early twenties. I had just moved to Gurgaon for an internship. I’m not sure why I chose the north when I did most of my growing up way down South in India – in Hyderabad throughout school and then Manipal for college. For those of you who don’t know, moving from Manipal to Bangalore, tackily known as the Silicon Valley of India, is an easy transition. God knows it would’ve been easier to just move back to Hyderabad for a job as well. But as I watched most of friends giddily migrate as a group to Bangalore, I chose the place that would leave me the most alone, stripped away of any safety I would’ve otherwise had in a new city. I’m not sure what I was trying to accomplish, but at the time, it seemed like a good idea.

But when I landed, I noticed something odd on my phone, the weather report, which read, ‘dust’. I wasn’t aware of dust being a type of weather. But here in Delhi NCR, that’s something you just get used to. Fuck. What did I get myself into? That’s what I thought in that exact moment. But this was a place I was supposed to call home for the next 6 months at least. No friends. No safety net. A new chapter. A new me.

Remember when I mentioned that I would fast forward through the unnecessary? Well, that would be me powering through the day-to-days. I worked at a start-up, and there wasn’t a lot separating an intern from an employee. I remember our HR rep telling us during orientation that it’s good to have work-life balance, that it’s important to have a world outside of work. We were encouraged to leave by 6:00PM. But honestly, I found myself packing my things at around 9:00 PM or even as late as midnight. The stereotype of long hours in start-ups is real, and absurdly so.

But working such hours comes at a price. You don’t really find the time for chores. This is a problem for anyone fussy about being clean and organised. So, I had to hack my way into a situation in which I wouldn’t need to cook my own food, bother with groceries, or even clean my room for that matter. I chose to stay at a paying guest accommodation for this reason. It was a bit expensive but worth it. I got three meals. My room was cleaned every day. And the only thing I needed to take some time out for was laundry. This arrangement left me with enough time between being barely awake and the hazy hours at work to tidy up, trim that beard, and wear good, clean clothes every day. You might wonder if it’s really all that hard to do just this much. For me, back then, that was all I could manage outside of work. That – that was my work-life balance.

To be fair, I didn’t really hate work. It was good. I learned everything at an accelerated pace, as is usually the case with start-ups. Thinking back, it certainly set me up well for future jobs. And thinking back some more, I did treasure leaving work at 9:00PM. During the early phases of the internship, courtesy of being in a new city, far, far from everything I’ve ever known, I didn’t really have much of a life outside of work. I haven’t always been the type to socialise with just anyone, so returning home late at night, when most of the other guests had turned in for the day worked out great for me.  

I used to travel to and from work using an auto rickshaw. But the night has a way of making you fall in love with being alone. So, I started walking back home at night. I would’ve preferred to walk both ways – home wasn’t all that far from work, 30 minutes keeping a casual pace at most – but in a hot, polluted city, you don’t want to be walking for whatever reason during rush hour. But on the way back, walking had a way of washing away the nonsense - the blaring horns, the rotting smells, even other people. You are just you.

It's through these walks that I got to bond with a small pack of dogs near home. Three adult dogs, and well, many puppies. Six. Maybe more. I’ve already told you that I grew to appreciate dogs, love them. I went from feeling indifferent towards dogs as a child to being comfortable around them, sitting with them, and even eating with them. In college, I spent a lot of time on the grass, in secluded corners, studying for tests or covering gaps between classes, with a few free-roaming dogs around me. They never asked for much more than my company, beautiful creatures, all of them. Now I would say that they’re misunderstood. But ‘misunderstanding’ would imply an attempt to ‘understand’ at least. But I digress. The walks, the small pack – three adults, many puppies.

I recall one of the dogs being very noisy. He would often bark at me, distrustfully. I didn’t mind. I would’ve had a problem with a stranger walking into my home as well. It’s a process. But I knew that getting to know him would be key in unlocking the whole pack for me. He was the only male dog in the pack, and he fiercely guarded his family. I wasn’t worried. I had 6 months to do this. No friends. No life outside of work. Except now I had a chance at a life outside of work. With this pack. Sometimes I would observe them from a distance, watch them being just so intelligent and interesting. The puppies would play around, bully those weaker than them, but the adults were all business mostly. One of them would often bring back food for the puppies. Occasionally, the adults would also wrestle and play amongst themselves. Now that’s what I call work-life balance.

Until then, I had a rather simple approach with free-roaming dogs – befriend only those willing to befriend you. I respect dogs needing more work than just casual baby talk, or even food. Just like with humans, dogs come with different personalities. You can’t be friends with everyone. It’s not that hard to understand. But sometimes, you’re thrust into situations that, well, force you to make friends, look beyond first impressions really, because you just wouldn’t have that many options otherwise. This was such a situation with me. I lived here. And I thought it would cool and easier to be friends with the dogs here than go looking somewhere far from home.

In theory, this makes perfect sense. In practice, I remember asking myself, ‘how?’